I was working my crochet on the bus today and my hands were dry… It seems like dry hands cause you to feel every twist of thread in a strand of yarn, doesn’t it? I know I did… and it got me wondering about something I thought about a few days ago while I was working on my project at home.
I was watching one of the CSI shows and they were talking about epithelials, the skin cells that slough off our bodies when we touch things, and how they were found on some object that was relevant to their case.
It got me thinking this:
Every time I touch this skein of yarn and wind it around my hand, pulling up loops to create the fabric, I’m leaving a little bit of me behind. It’s not just my skill (or lack of it!) as a crafter that goes into, not just my time, not just my effort – but actual small bits of me that hold my very DNA are being woven in as well.
That might gross some people out… but not me. I was kind of awed by the thought. I don’t think anyone who picks up a crochet hook or a set of knitting needles ever thought of what they do as being anything other than personal. To me those little skin cells are physical reminders of the love, the heart, the soul we put into every project our hands touch. And yeah, they probably all get wiped away when we wash or block those projects but I’d like to think that just a little bit of me is locked in and will stay with whoever holds or wears that piece.
Oy. Do you ever get that feeling you’ve gotten in way over your head but you’ve committed yourself to a course of action and to pull out now would be worse than starting all over?
Oh, I am so there!
I started working on the Big Bow Cardigan… which only days ago I was so excited about. Now, not so much. It’s a simple, easy pattern… so why do I want to tear my hair out six rows in? Why does the prospect of following through on an apparel sized project make me want go find the razorblades that I know must be lurking somewhere in the medicine cabinet?
As a wise young actor once said, “I can’t know.”
Is it that, as a returning crafter, I’m insecure about my ability to achieve gauge? Is it that I don’t want to show up to YarnThings with a hot mess on my hands? Or maybe, just maybe, my eyes were bigger than my crochet hook?
I’m freakin’ and Beacon doesn’t handle this… so, I’m going to give the Big Bow a break, read about Edward Cullen and Bella Swan for a couple of hours, have a little mini prayerfest, and get some sleep.